Archive for December, 2012

DD #518

If this writing dearth continues, I’m going to have to call it quits.  It’s painful to keep wondering if I’ve become too dumb to have not one interesting thing to say after the passing of an entire day.  As in Mulberry street, did not one thing catch my eye, something to remark on, darn – how did that guy rhyme this thought?

Two days of requests to Universe and I finally moved myself to look for sofas.  Have found one potential, two great reclining chairs.  Need to convince myself of its goodness, so have to look in other places.  But feels good to at least have one option.  Dear Universe – would really appreciate a lower price option which has the same high quality, though.

Saw the monster sheds in BFP’s backyard.  Here’s the q – both of them are tiny, not more than 5’4.  Nor are their children any taller.  How are they going to reach the top of the shed?  It must be at least 12 feet high?  Another q – they have this shed, 2 attics and 1 garage and she still wants to store her stuff in my garage.  What are they doing with all the space they already have available?  The house is appointed very well, with choice pieces from the store.  Am at once envious and not.  Not envious because our tastes are so different and I wouldn’t have picked the same pieces, but am because she has an entire warehouse to pick from.

So sleepy, am heading off to bed.



















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DD #517

DD is lying down next to me.  I hope she doesn’t become curious about what I’m typing in here.  Hey!  Day 1 of weaning myself from TV is done.  I didn’t spend much time at home, so I don’t know that I actually worked at controlling myself.  The one time I folded clothes, I put on Hariprasad Chaurasia for me and DD to listen to.  So that went well.  Tomorrow is football, do football days count?  Technically they should.  Maybe I should amend to if am watching TV, need to do something productive during that time, ironing, cleaning etc.  But cleaning and folding take forever when I watch TV, so it’s got to be only ironing.

My mind’s a virtual blank.  I’m flailing around for things to write about, but can’t come up with more than a line.  This is rather unusual for me, it’s beginning to write that is the hardest, not the actual content itself.  Now I’m struggling with that too.  Let’s see how this falls out.

Off to bed.

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DD #516

Howdy!  It has been a day of movies.  I read this in a magazine when waiting for DS’ teeth to be cleaned, or perhaps DD’s asthma appt, about the difference between children raised in Papua New Guinea and other small tribes vs kids in Western civilization.  The author said the kids in the latter are way more comfortable in their skin, social, curious than kids in the Western regions.  The part that went in like a dart – They don’t like to consume entertainment passively – no movies, TV etc, but like to create their own.  Today, I was the anti PNG.  Woke at ~9, wathched football, The Odd life of Timothy Green, some Sound of Music and then The Descendants.  Two of my favorite movies are George Clooney’s now.  I mean favorite as in my favorite lines in a movie.  Up in the air is another of his that I can still recall.  The conversation about how lists fall away and how you would settle for a guy who has a nice smile and is kind to animals – resonance!   In The Descendants – the goodbye to the wife, I think I’ll carry it around for a while.

I have nothing to say to BFP anymore!  I don’t have much to chatter away to myself anymore, so what the heck do I have to say to her?  She keeps saying I don’t need to worry about DS – MMC will make sure he has a job, give him one at the school or something.  What rankles me is the assumption I hear that DS won’t be sought after to fill a position, that he’ll slide in here because someone pulled some strings to make it happen.  Oh, DS – that you would put me in this spot!  And then always, “You dont seem pariticlarly enthusiastic about the plan.  What’s the reason?”  ,  The solicitation to add drama to the conversation – argh, partucularly frustrating.  Oh well!

Universe!  my sofa!!

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DD #515

Hello again!  This is a surprise – checking in with you 2 days in a row, but I have to type fast – I have little laptop power.  Not that I have much to say.  Honestly, now what do I do?

I watched this movie HeadHunter.  It had a lot of tension, that’s for sure.  A huge amount of gore.  Some industrial espionage thing trying to explain the why of it.  But the thing is – no character was remotely likable, except for the goddess wife who inexplicably loves a short guy who looks like a fish.  One of the few guys who looks better bald than with his golden hair.   They did go to lengths to explain how it all worked out so that fish guy is off the hook, but like I told DH, it’s like a Ludlum novel, you are glad it’s over and you don’t want to revisit to see if he did cover all the bases.  But gross amounts of flesh and blood – gag!

There’s the power warning.  I spent $150 on DS’s thermal underwear!  I spent $55 on Sees Candies for the Christmas gifts and then I spent $65 at the OceanView books and one CD for DD’s flute teacher.  Don’t recall the last time I’ve spend 250$ in one day.

Interesting time today with Babaji at MMC.  There was such fog, it felt like we were in Howl’s moving castle, floating around.  DS is going to be staying there for a few days, he looked so happy to be there.  B looked happy to have him. BFFP’s and my conversation only center around MMC and its people.  I need a topic change!  What else do I need?  A #(*$&# sofa!!  Universe, please hear my plea!!  How hard can it be for you to produce a couch for me!!  Come on!!

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DD #514

Finally, a marvelous words post!  I have been wondering if Universe had stopped sending me messages or I froze my reception.  Yeah, yeah, I know it is the latter.  I even cringe when I write Universe and reception, but hey, those are the words I know right now.  Brought to me from my inspirers at Blue Mountain:

What I needed most was to love and to be loved. I rushed headlong into love, eager to be caught. Happily I wrapped those painful bonds around me; and sure enough, I would be lashed with the red-hot pokers of jealousy, by suspicions and fear, by bursts of anger and quarrels. 
– Saint Augustine

Hugs to you Saint A!  red hot pokers indeed and even with this agreement, how doubtful I feel about the other way.  My fear wails,”But that is the price of love!  How can you live without it?”.  The other way, detachment, seems so bloodless…  Where is the piece of the puzzle I’m missing?  I know my fear is incorrect, my intellect which mulls how it is to be otherwise is also not true, so what’s the disconnect?

One of the things I’m observing lately – I’m rather pleasantly surprised at this turn of events – is that I’m stopping myself playing or replaying events in my head.  I’m able to catch myself in that hamster wheel and say huh! and this is the best part, get off that ride.  The side effect is that even if I want to continue the brooding/day-dreaming, once the awareness sets in, there’s no turning back.  Starting up that line of thought just seems false and requires more effort than not.  How’s that for interesting!

Dec 21 is almost gone, do all the stupids feel stupid about their fear of end of the world?  Per the news, kids were thinking about killing themselves because they didn’t want to face the apocalypse.  There go some Darwin awardees.  Some idiot woman wondered if she should put he dog to sleep because she didn’t want him to suffer on doomsday.  How did she think she’d live with herself on Dec 22 if there were no apocalypse?  How in the world is it possible for anyone to be patient with these people?  And there’s the kumbaya crowd – this is the beginning of a new epoch where we’ll reclaim our ability to levitate and communicate by telepathy – my gag reflex is exhausted.  Am glad we don’t have that craziness to flog anymore!



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DD #513

Why do I have so little to say anymore on the blog?  Or do I not make the time for it?  Is it really a function of letting work trump everything?  For whatever reason, house, car both look messy. The only room that actually looks good is the Swami room, go figure!  Mt. Washmore is gaining new heights.  Yes, the only thing I can point to is the work.  But I am glad I got the tree up.  Thanks to dd.  She kept me honest.  

Adya’s Christmas retreat was last weekend.  True to form, #1 was divine, #2 meh.  I was exhausted, so I slept through a part of it.  He was talking about the apostle Peter getting reamed out by Jesus because the guy didn’t know how to have a relationship with Jesus, he was either too obsequious, too meagre, tried too hard.  And Pontius Pilate – not being able to accept the divine because of fetters of convention.  I hope it’s like reading a medical book and feeling you have all the symptoms, because I feel I’m 80/20 Peter/PP.  No hugs this year!  A book signing instead.  I didn’t have the guts to ask him for mine.  

I am breaking 140 in weight!  Getting ~ 5 hours of sleep a night.  Flylady, Gretchen Rubin, Therese B, Leo B, Seth G – none of them are in my life anymore.  Careening!

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